Well, I'm done waiting for her to get her shit together and become an adult. I'm not going to cut her off cold turkey, but I need to make it clear she does not have unlimited time. So I e-mailed her this:
| About spousal support. These payments are intended to give you time to find employment so that you can support yourself. As I said several times during the divorce process, I was also willing to continue this support for up to three years so that you could go back to school. Now, it is your life and I have no interest in telling you what to do. However, at this point I feel no further moral obligation (nor do I have one legally) to continue making payments to you while you do neither of these....I will keep the payments at their current level through September and then stop them. (This does not include the mortgage payments, which I will continue to make until the September following Taylor's 18th birthday.) |
So how did she take it?
| This is not something which you get to decide unilaterally....Well I guess we will go back to court only this time I will show up. I am still seeing a therapist and on medication, but am no longer clinically depressed to the point of only marginally functioning. So I won't be such a pushover. Agian, you have rationalized that you are "the good guy" and don't have to be "generous". Well, we disagree about what is fair, about what is legal, about what you get to unilaterally decide. |
Well, guess what Brett? If you check the divorce decree, it says I only have to pay you $1000 a month through last September. What I am paying you now is entirely my choice. The law is completely on my side. I can be as unilateral with my money as I want. You've got eight months to become enough of an adult to at least attempt to support yourself. Get cracking.
2 comments:
You tell her! Damn, she is so lucky that you paid what you have... I get £200 a month from the boys' dad, for child maintenance, and that's that. Nothing more, occasionally less, and that's it.
Some people just take things for granted I guess. :S
You're very generous. My income is around $900-$1100/mo, and I try to spend only around $800 of that. I'm not saying she needs to realize how much better she has it than some people, since she's been independent for more than the six months I have (I'm so young!), but you've paid a ton more than you had to and arguably a ton more than she deserves, and she needs to realize that's no small expenditure on your part.
I get the part where she's being a huge pain to you even though you've, frankly, shown a lot of care and consideration for her over the past several forevers (people are terrible like that all the time), but what always throws me is how people can live with themselves being that much of a pain to people they once cared about enough to marry.
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