End Of An Era

So, the last space shuttle mission ended today. I've read and heard a number of people say that it is a sad thing. But, I don't see it that way. The space shuttles had a degree of coolness, but to be honest I'm glad they're done. In fact, I belong to the school of thought that manned space travel is a bad idea.

I shall explain.

One of the issues you have when you put a man into space is that you kind of need to bring him back. This means that in addition to the man, you need a vehicle. This vehicle needs a lot of fuel. This in turn means that you need a lot more fuel to get the man and his vehicle and its fuel into space in the first place. A Saturn V rocket was 363 feet tall and weighed seven million pounds, all necessary so that three men could go to the moon and back (and only two of them actually got to land - one had to stay in orbit). That's a lot. No other rocket comes close. I can't imagine how big a rocket you would need to send men to Mars and back.

Of course, going to Mars would mean a multi-stage mission, not a single shot. Probably an enhanced space station would be built to support a permanent moon base. The Mars mission would depart from there, probably with the crew in one rocket and supplies in other rockets. All just to get some men there who would take some pictures, collect some rocks, and then scamper for home.

Meanwhile, we are already exploring Mars. Mariner, Viking, Global Surveyor, Phoenix, Pathfinder, Odyssey, Spirit and Opportunity, Reconnaissance Orbiter, ... The list keeps growing, and each mission is more sophisticated than the last. There have been plenty of failed missions as well, but the price of failure is a hundred pounds of scrap metal smeared across a Martian plain. That's a lot cheaper than a half dozen human beings smeared across the same plain. A robotic explorer doesn't need food or water or exercise equipment or a toilet, and it doesn't need fuel to bring it back to earth. A human explorer may be able to do more than a single robot, but every year the gap is narrowing. How many robotic explorers could we send to Mars for the cost of a manned mission? Hundreds? Thousands? Not exciting, not glamorous, but we'd learn far more about another planet.

The space shuttle is basically a dump truck. Big payload, powerful but short-range rockets. To keep the cost down, it was designed withe the rockets, the fuel tanks, the payload, and the crew all side-by-side, rather than stacked like a conventional rocket. This meant that when something went wrong, as it did with Challenger in '86 and Columbia in '03, the crews were vulnerable, and they died. In both cases, cost- and PR-conscious NASA administrators overuled attempts to actually solve the problems, and the crews died. NASA has become as clumsy and badly-configured as the shuttles themselves.

Seeing people be launched into space, and safely return, is a stirring sight. But is it worth it, when there are cheaper, better ways that don't put brave people at risk? I don't think so.

Go Away Monday

No want.

Because Pugs Are Awesome...

...if a tad on the short side

It's Friday!

I so excited.

Messing With The In-Laws

J: I'm going to change my Facebook relationship status to "It's complicated."

M: Why would you do that?

J: Because then your parents will call you and ask what's wrong.

M: Yes, they will freak out and they will want to know what they can do to help, and they won't believe me when I say everything's fine so they will keep calling.

J: Yeah, you will like. It's good to talk to your parents.

M: No, it's going to get old after the second call.

J: Yes, but I will be amused, which is the most important thing. And then tomorrow? I'll change my status to "divorced". That'll really drive them crazy!

<thirty minutes later>

J: Ha-HAAAAH! I had a better idea. I'm going to make the change to your Facebook status! You will like.

M: Great googly moogly.

Why The Hell Is This An Issue?

An article in Salon is talking about politeness and sexism and manners and "benevolent sexism" and punching feminists and all that stuff. The thing that jumped out at me in all this was how many people obsess about holding the door open for someone else. Is it acceptable? Is it sexist? Is it both, or is it just rude? Everyone's got an opinion, or an anecdote, or something.

What. The. Hell?

Here is my experience: when I go through a door (or open a door and am about to go through it) and I see someone approaching with the obvious intent of also going through the door, I hold the door so it doesn't close in their face. Usually I get a "thank you", sometimes there is no feedback. Conversely, when I am approaching a door someone else has just used, they almost always hold it open so it doesn't close in my face, and I say "thank you". It all takes about a second, and then we go on our separate ways. Certainly, nobody has ever yelled at me or threatened violence over it.

Now, nowhere in this is anybody's sex a factor. Ever. I hold the door for women and men alike, women and men alike hold the door for me. There's no chivalry, no condesencion, no fears of "does it make me kind of a fag?" It's just people being polite to each other, and it's never mattered whether I was in Texas or New York or California or Iowa.

Does these dynamics suddenly alter when neither party is a middle-aged nondescript guy? Or is the whole thing nothing more than a memory from how things were in some antideluvian era when everyone let the door close in guys' faces, a memory that keeps us from noticing how the world actually works today?

Umm.... Oops?

The Internet Brings People Together

Julie's in Florida this week, visiting her family. But thanks to the magic of the internet, we can stay close.

Julie:  I miss you honey

Julie:here, I will help you not miss me

me:  uh oh

Julie:  Michael, will you write my paper?

Julie:  My feet hurt.

Julie:  I need rubs

Julie:  can you get me a soda babe?

Julie:  I hate school.

Julie:  I am quitting my job

Julie:  its all your fault

Julie:  everything.

Julie:  I will give you 5 dollars

Julie:  there, feel better?

me:  it's like you are right here with me

Julie:  I NEED MONIES

Two Of My All-Time Favorite Aliens

Right up there with Chewbacca, Mr. Spock, and that dude with the, you know, things.

A Follow-Up To That Last Post

via Damn You Autocorrect dot com.

Yeah, I Thought People Might React Like This

Poor Ned Stark.

Cancer Update

Julie had another full-body PET scan this week, and the results were negative - no cancerous cells anywhere. It's been about a year now since she finished her treatments; just four more to go until she is considered "cured". Which is really an aknowledgement that you've been cured the whole time, but we weren't sure until now. Very inconvenient system, but it's the best they've got. Of course, there's still about a 20-25% chance that there's still mutant cells somewhere in her body, just laying low until they decide to start making tumors again. And if they do, well, that would be really really bad. So, every few months we'll be going through this, worrying and scanning and then worrying more.

Unfortunately, not having any cancer doesn't mean she's free of the consequences. Between the cancerous lymph nodes being taken out and the scarring from the radiation, Julie gets a lot of swelling in her chest and arm as fluids build up and can't drain efficiently. It can get very painful, and pretty much the only thing that helps is for me to massage the affected areas. It may get somewhat better with time, but for the most part she's going to have to deal with it for the rest of her life. I was talking to a friend whose wife underwent treatment for leukemia about seven years ago, including a bone marrow transplant. We agreed that if ordinary people were coming down with these kinds of chronic issues, it would most likely be labeled a major health issue and billions would go for finding cures. But since it's cancer, the medical industry shrugs its collective shoulders and says "well, it's better than being dead isn't it?" Yeah, it is, but that doesn't make the pain any less.

Cancer sucks.

Out Of Context

Talking to Julie while she is playing World of Warcraft can be damaging to one's self-image:

"Can you bring me a soda, baby?"

"Sure, love."

"You asshole!"

"Huh?"

"Stupid gorilla."

Happy Mother's Day

"I love you more than you love me."

"That's not true!"

"It is."

"We both love each other more than we can count. So how can you say you love me more?"

"Because I do."

"If you love me more, how come I'm the one who logged out and am giving you a backrub so you can keep playing?"

"Because it's Mother's Day, beeyatch."

Daaaang.......

Well, there's your problem!

From seniorgif.com

5 Things I Have Never Done

...and really hope I never do.

1) Follow the "Shake well before opening" instructions on a can of Slim-Fast, forgetting that I'm actually holding a can of Diet Coke.

2) Drop my cell phone in the toilet.

3) Use two cups of salt instead of two cups of sugar when baking a pie.

4) Call my wife my ex's name.

5) Convince myself I can manage to carry a really big really expensive tv up the stairs without help.

AvP Poker Faces

Yeah. I nerdgasmmed.

Winter Is Coming

This Sunday, at 8:00 pm Central time.

Pimp My Sith

Culture Fail

Julie:  Turkey is Emerilized!

me:  is wha?

Julie:  BAM!

me:  are you drunk?

Julie:  YOU DONT KNOW WHO EMERIL IS?!

me:  no....

Julie:  FFS use Google, Michael
he is probably one of the most famous chefs of current times

me:  ok
does he say "bam!" a lot?

Julie:  YES MICHAEL
GOOGLE BAM

me:  ok, I got

Julie:  omfg
you have just traumatized me
guh.

me:  I sorry

Julie:  I just don't get how you didn't know who he was
and since you didn't, you don't realize how nice it is that I am using his recipe to make you a turkey

me:  I am sure it is awesome


EDIT: Yeah, it was the best turkey dinner I've ever had. BAM!